Recently a casual friend of mine experienced an unpleasant incident. She parked her vehicle in an unauthorized location where there were many other cars. As she was preparing the leave, a policeman appeared. Seeing her diplomatic plates and feeling inspired by the opportunity to demonstrate his authority the officer ordered that she move the car. My friend is not from Azerbaijan and has recently moved to Baku. She defied his order, dared to contradict him, and ended up doing what women do best – creating a small scandal.

Ultimately she moved the car and by lunchtime forgot about the unfortunate incident. Then suddenly her husband called asking what had happened and what the story of insubordination to public authorities. She could not immediately associate his reproach with the morning’s confrontation triggered by illegal parking. Later, however, she realized that the policeman found out her spouse’s telephone number, called him and offered to resolve matters in a man-to-man fashion. In any case, the row was hushed up but what appalled my friend most was that the policeman called her husband to talk on equal terms: "What am I going to deal with a woman for?”

The foreign lady was shocked. Of course I’ve witnessed similar scenes regularly since my very childhood and what shocked me was that I did not find the situation surprising in the least. To my utter amazement, I was able to understand the policeman. I could explain to the foreigner what had occurred and recalled my colleague’s words once addressed to me: "Although you are a woman, your word is strong”. This made me think about human complexes.

Since I was a little girl I’ve told that men and women are different. Not better or worse, not weaker or stronger, just different. That is why I never think of men as being equal to us. There is no point in comparing ourselves to them. But what is truly questionable is the attitude of men who even to this day cannot seem to take us, women, seriously.

Despite the fact that women study better, work harder and even bear children, an Eastern man keeps looking down on them. Why he acts like this is clear – human behaviors take root from our childhood. The issue of how to tackle this condescending attitude is still on the agenda.

Personally, I have worked out a strategy to tame obstinate men based on a classification by age groups. Let’s start with the young and inexperienced ones. They are the easiest to handle of the lot. When they were growing up, there were fewer stereotypes; besides, most of them were educated abroad. We have allies in their camp. These young men – graduates of American and European universities – with an Eastern upbringing and a Western education represent an interesting surrogate in terms of their relationships with women. They listen to our opinion. It is pleasant to interact with them – they would hardly initiate a hand-shake with a lady or inquire about her income.

With older men I tend to be more arrogant, trying to impress on their delicate psyche the benefits of my excellent education, intimidate them with my writing ability and command their respect with my knowledge of the political situation. Recently, a neighbor visited us to get my opinion on whether he should keep his savings in euro or in dollars. This made me realize that my life was not a waste.

Communicating with my peers is the most challenging part. They like to patronize women but it does not work because they have no trump cards. We grow up faster and mature earlier than men and therefore manage to achieve more. That is why they resort to all possible means to take "revenge” on us: spreading rumors, creating problems for us at work, and in general doing anything to make our lives miserable. I have nothing in common with such men and I simply try to stay away from them.

For the best communication pattern emerges with men who have earned a name for themselves in science, art, or business. They will never compare themselves to us. They know how difficult it is to succeed in life, they treat us with due respect.

My preferred approach however is the game strategy. I play a man’s role. My daily behavior proves that I am not inferior to men in anything. I don’t remember to have broken my promise or created unmet expectations. I don’t flirt. I look in the eyes, pay for myself, keep secrets and don’t forgive betrayal. I’m happy to have quite a few female and male friends who are like me.